A Job Fair held in a space twice the size of previous years' events -- with half the booths. Sad. I was able to drop off two resumes. Yes. Two.
And I was told, "We don't have anything for you right now, but ... "
I was overhearing a lot of other people getting told that, too.
Strangely, that's not very comforting.
Realized last night that the High Tech Job Fair is today, and, since I'm rapidly running out of money, I really ought to hie myself hence and drag a few resumes with me.
Updating and tweaking the formatting of my resume took longer than it really ought to have, and my friendly neighborhood Kinko's clerk cheerfully informed me that it would take two hours for them to run off a few lousy copies of my resume, and would I like to use one of the self-serve machines -- ? I wouldn't, actually, since I quickly realized I had no idea how to get them to print double-sided copies. Fuck this, says I, I'll go to the Kinko's at Northgate.
See, I had the time to do something like that -- the hours of the Fair are 11:00-2:00 and 4:00-7:00, and it was already after 1:00 -- so by the time I got downtown, if I headed straight there, I would end up in the middle of that "dead zone." So I had a little time to kill.
Northgate Kinko's could accomodate me in six minutes, not two hours, so they got my money. I then decided I really wanted a late lunch at McDonald's. (I know, I know. Shut up.) So I head to McDonald's and squirt ketchup onto my nice dress shirt.
So I'm home again, now, to grab a different shirt, and try to run a brush through my unruly hair again.
Now to head out and tackle the Fair itself. The day can only get better. I hope.
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treebyleaf's to catch the premiere of Enterprise. Not looking forward
to the drive. People always drive like idiots in weather like this.Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back was a lot of fun, but I can't possibly recommend it to anyone who isn't already a big fan of Kevin Smith's films -- it's essentially one long in-joke. But since I am a big fan, I thought it was great.
After waiting impatiently for days for my voting key to vote for the location of the next Convergence, it finally struck me last night that maybe they'd sent it to my "other" e-mail address, an account that I don't check very often -- not since August 1st, it turned out. They had. I found my voting key -- after wading through over 600 pieces of spam. No joke.
I slept for over twelve hours last night, which is ridiculous. My sleep was troubled by a strange series of dreams, a kind I've had a couple of times before in my life -- dreams where I meet someone and fall quickly and deeply in love with them, and I wake up feeling shaken and lost, and have a hard time remembering that the dreams weren't real. I have no idea why this happens.
wendolen took me out for dinner, again, and I was bright enough to order coffee.
It didn't make my headache go away, but it lifted my Weltschmerz.Then we came back to my place and I finally showed her The Frighteners, one of my favorite movies and one I knew she'd love. She did. We didn't get to bed until 1:30 AM. Strangely, it feels like a victory. Continuing to fuck up my sleep schedule seems preferable to giving in to the desire to just sleep my way through sadness.
That does seem to be the form my depression takes, lately -- whenever I get really depressed about something, I immediately want to go lie down and sleep, no matter what time of day it is. It's kind of frightening, really.
Anyway. On another note -- I think I want to see if Third Place Books is hiring. I'm sick to death of the tech industry, and I've wanted to work in a bookstore since I was little. I'd be making a hell of a lot less money than I'm used to, but that would be okay, I think. I really like Third Place Books, and it's very, very close to the fabric store where both wendolen and treebyleaf work. It's something to think about.
I just don't have the energy to do anything. This is the most insidious kind of depression, this numbing apathy; I can't do anything about it because I can't seem to make myself want to do anything about it.
At least now I have external causes to blame my depression on.
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zvi and krja
