Boundless.

"1. Must demonstrate a Customer First perspective and fully participate in the Boundless Selling culture." -- OfficeMax Print & Document Services Associate Job Description

Here we go -- back down the rabbit hole of modern corporate life. Barring anything going horribly wrong with my drug screen¹ or my background check, I've got the job, and should start sometime next week.

_________________
1. I always swore I'd never pee in a cup to get a job. *shrug* Food first, ethics later.